Saturday, January 29, 2011

Let's Talk....

about bullying. First let's set the scene...

Me in my pj's, hair in a mess, barely awake enough to move from the couch to the bed to watch my son Hayden off to school. I noticed as I was feeding my fish on Happy Aquarium one of those feelings that make you turn your head...

 I looked out the window and saw 3 boys all about 3 years older than my son grabbing each of his limbs pulling the opposite way. Yes you read correctly. One had his arm, one had the other arm and one had a leg. I glance around and notice all the snow and ice around and immediately think of the worst possible outcome of this situation. (Need I go back to winter of 09' that we like to call the Bloody massacre? I'll share that one later) Now as most moms who read this, will understand I immediately turned into a roaring lion who would have rammed itself out of my bay window... but since my husband was standing in the near vicinity I started yelling (maybe screaming) for his assistance. He then ran outside to yell (and the boys proceeded to run away) and make sure our son was ok. Hayden nodded and turned back to the bus stop because the bus was then pulling up to take the demon boys and my little angel to school (he is a soldier what can I say).

I then looked to my left (still from the couch, it's cold people and I'm half naked) and noticed there is a mom standing 10 feet away with her child who ignored this entire act of bullying..... seriously? Are we so blind we can't stick up for a child 10 feet away?

I turned my head in disgust and made a mental note of the neighbor who will not be getting my delicious baked good this year. Later when Hayden got home from school we talked to him to see what had happened. He said the boys were being mean and wouldn't let him go and were trying to throw him potato sack style.... Nice....

As irony occurs more often in my life then I would like it.. I was driving home from a tea party with my friend Valerie the same day (when I was dressed this time) and we came upon 2 boys throwing a smaller boy onto the ice. I of course, still steaming from the morning incident, put on the brakes and rolled down my window. I then demanded to know what the heck the boys thought they were doing.. Looking at me like doe in headlights, I then jumped out of my car (after I put it in park of course) and walked over to the small boy still laying on the slab of ice. I made sure he was ok and unharmed, I then made the 2 older boys (all of which came from the middle school) help the boy up and then apologize. I lectured them about bullying and told them I would be calling parents if I saw it again. The small boy was ok thankfully.

The whole situation still gets my blood boiling. I can promise you, my readers that I, as a parent will do everything in my power... every ounce of my body to make sure my children will never bully other kids.

Be an advocate for children. Please talk to them about being kind to others and help put a stop to bullying. That is all.

xoxo

11 comments:

  1. It is so great to see someone take a stand. I was bullied when I was a kid and that is the last thing I want my children to go through. Parents need to step up and stop it before it starts.

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  2. Thank you for this post! As a school teacher I deal with bullying every day. In fact, my school is performing a flash mob dance scene choreographed to the song "Firework" by Katy Perry to be videotaped for a anti-bullying video. Also I see parents all the time take a blind eye, even if it is their own child being a bully. They will find every excuse and blame other children. It is sickening.

    XOXO,
    Danielle
    itisajoiseywayofthinking.blogspot.com

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  3. Its not right for anyone to turn a blind eye to bullying, it makes me sick to think of these kids hurting and picking on each other.

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  4. This reminds me of something I saw at my store (the store in which I work) the other night before I started my shift. A man was yelling at his daughter because she wouldn't do whatever it was he wanted. I can understand disciplining your kids, but this was horrible. He was SCREAMING, and she was crying. I was scared to help her out. I KNOW I should have said something. Everyone within 10 feet of the guy should have said something. Instead, I walked to my station and called a manager. I guess I sort of did the right thing, barely being bigger than the little girl, myself. I just couldn't understand WHY no one else was trying to help her. Bullying doesn't come just from other kids. In this girl's case it was from her own father!

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  5. omg...I can't believe that your son was treated that way!! I also really cannot believe that a parent would stand by and not say anything. Bullying is such an awful thing, and I really agree with you that it wouldn't be going on if parents would talk to their children about it. I think it was so awesome of you to stop those boys from bullying that poor little boy. I'm sure his parents would be very grateful to you.

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  6. That is terrible!!! We barely had bullying when I was at school, These kids need to be punished but on the flip side of the coin you'll probably find that these children that are bullying are being bullied themselves... either by older kids or worse their parents...an action always causes a re-action , It saddens me to think people think its ok.

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  7. even reading that my blood was boiling. I was bullied at school so if i ever saw a kid being bullied i would start wrecking all around and about me! Go you for doing that. I seriously would have grabbed those two wee fellas by the ears and dragged them (and i mean dragged) to their parents front door!

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  8. As a mom of a nine year old boy, who is on the small side and has been a victim of bullying, I can't thank you enough for sticking up for that little boy who was not your own. To make the situation better the only thing I can hope is that other parents are vigilant and active in stopping this type of appalling behavior. Turning a blind eye is not making anything better. Isn’t admitting there’s a problem the first step to fixing it? Kudos to you for intervening and posting about the incidents!

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  9. Saddest part of this, most of the parents of bullies don't read these blogs (or these kinds of blogs). :(
    They are usually bullied themselves at home, or watch his family members bully or abuse each other. Not all, but in my experience - 90% of the time.

    Having a son who is soon will be of school age, that's my biggest fear - what is he is bullied? How will I handle that situation? How will I teach my son to handle it?

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  10. Thank you for standing up for children. It is one thing to stand up for your own child, but another thing entirely to publicly intervene in a random child's situation. I think as a society, we have become so scared to get involved. Fear of stepping on other parent's or teachers toes...."their child, their responsibility" type of attitude. But don't we all have a responsibility to be upstanding citizens?! I don't have a problem stepping up and being the mom of the situation when other parents aren't around. It's when they are there, it gets a little tricky to know when you should say something or not. I see things every day (granted, not as serious as bullying), but still things that bother me, that I don't do anything about. I see moms walking around in a mall a good 50 feet in front of their small children, not once looking back to see if they are trailing behind. It blows my mind that people don't look out for children like they should! I'm sorry that that parent at the bus stop didn't do anything. It's that kind of behavior that teaches bullies that what they are doing is ok. Let's just turn a blind eye to the problem, shall we?! Geez. This post could get really long if I let it, but I just wanted to say that I am proud of you for doing the right thing. Your children will learn from your good example, and by sharing you remind us all that even though it isn't always easy, we have to do the right thing. Take these bullies down a few notches, they deserve to be put in their place. This world needs more good guys.

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